Oh, darn.
I haven’t sent out my CDs yet, but I will either tomorrow or on Friday. I just never make it to the post office in time these days. Sorry to those who have to wait. I have the mixes ready, though, so don’t worry. For everybody else who wants to know, here’s the track listing for my very own summer compilation.
There’s things to write about and stuff to tell, but I just can’t seem to find the right moment to actually do it. Damn.
Please be patient with me. I know I’ll come around, I always do. Just not tonight, maybe tomorrow.
(And of course, what can you expect. I came home after work today and barely managed to do the dishes when the husband called because he needed me to come pick him up, since of course he took the car to get to this world cup public viewing thing with free beer(!) and how did he ever expect to not get drunk enough to not be able to drive home. So I had to take the bus back and get the husband and my cousin and then drop my cousin off and drive the husband home. Only we did stop to buy ice cream first. Plus, he has a new haircut and it’s really really short. What was he thinking?)
Huh. Turns out I had something to write about after all. Although it was mostly ranting. It still counts, doesn’t it?
I just started reading „The Princess Diaries“ on the bus today and I already know I’m going to love it. This is fun, quick, hilarious, just the kind of stuff I really really adore.
So it’s very hard for me not to go to Amazon right now and just order all the other books of the series. I figure it’s going to happen eventually anyway, so what the heck?
You can vote for your favorite literary villain here. I’m surprised by how many of those books and stories I know, but I haven’t decided yet. It’s a tough choice.
Though I don’t think that Captain Hook or The Grinch actually belong there. When I read Peter Pan I actually sympathized with Captain Hook a lot and saw him more like a broken man than an evil villain. And The Grinch actually came around in the end, so I wouldn’t call him a literary villain.
But then there are a lot of villains who really deserve to be on that list. So choose your favorite one. Or, if that sounds better, the villainiest villainy one. Or something like that.
I finished „The Amber Spyglass“ yesterday. For those of you who don’t know that book, it’s the third (and last) part of the „His Dark Materials“ series by Philip Pullman.
And it’s a desaster.
For one thing, if you asked me why it’s called „His Dark Materials“ I couldn’t possibly give you the answer. Because I still don’t know. I don’t know who „He“ is, nor why they’re dark and I can only guess that the materials are that which is called Dust, sraf, Shadows and possibly something else in the book. Just don’t ask me.
Let me also say that I loved the first book, liked the second book a lot (although I had the impression that the story was starting to fall apart somewhere in the second book) and I expected at least something remotely average (and possibly good) from the third.
There are a few things that bug me the most about the third book, so here we go.
For one thing, the author doesn’t care about being, you know, clear. It’s all so mystical and strange and not explainable. I have no problem with mystical and strange, but I like to have a proper explanation about WHAT’S GOING ON every once in a while. Because it helps and I believe that it’s also only fair to your readers. It’s all so confusing.
Then I don’t have a problem with an author weaving in his religious worldview into a book. I know (at least that’s what I read) that the Narnia books contain a lot of pretty old-fashioned Christian ideology and it’s okay. But it just doesn’t work here. Mostly because the author just focuses on what ideas he doesn’t approve of instead of actually telling what he believes in. It’s a complete mess. So, God is dead, huh? Okay, fine. But then I have a few questions: Who was God, actually? The fragile old creature who dissolved into air on that one page? And who exactly was fighting then? And why? And what role did Metatron have? And were all the Angels on one side or were they divided? And why?
And what was it all about that freaking Dust? And why was it flowing away? And was it flowing away only in that one world or in every world? And why was it bad? And what did it mean? And why did it stop flowing away? I guess I know why, but if it was just because of that (I won’t include spoilers here)… THE HELL? WHY?
I honestly can’t say if I’m too stupid for that book or if I’m actually too clever. All I can say that I felt it was full of plot holes, lacking a lot of explanations and I got the overall thinking the author himself didn’t actually know what he should do about the story he had begun. I still don’t know why Lyra was supposed to be that damned important. Up to when they were in the land of the dead she actually did things that seemed important and brave, but that was it. Nothing she did later on seemed especially important to me. She was mending nets and cuddling with her boyfriend, for Pete’s sake.
Another thing and then I’ll stop ranting. Promise. There were a lot of moments in the book where it felt like the author just randomly decided what a creature was capable of or not. And there’s a mini-spoiler here: When the dead left the land of the dead through the hole that Will’s knife had cut, they disappeared into the air. Lee Scoresby and Will’s father nevertheless decided they weren’t ready yet and needed to fight a bit more. Did I just miss something here or why didn’t they disappear when they were fighting alongside Lyra and Will? Didn’t that fight take place in another world as well? There were other moments like this that just seemed to lack of logic or at least consistency. It’s fine to make up all these weird creatures, but please give me an idea about what they can do and what they can’t and friggin‘ STICK TO IT. Because I don’t like it when every scene is resolved by a strange Deus Ex Machina just because you decided that it should be so.
Anyway, the first two books were good. Really. Especially the first one. Just know that when you read them there’s nearly no way not to read the third book, because that’s where the story ends and at least some of the questions are answered (although as you might have noticed not to my satisfaction).
I also have read a lot of praises for the third book, so once more tastes can vary and I guess it’s good that they do. I just didn’t like it. I thought it was confusing and inconsistent and just plain chaotic. The story never seemed to go anywhere. So there.
Now decide for your own. Or tell me what you think. Maybe I was just too stupid to understand this book, but I honestly doubt that.
Today we took a walk and discussed a few things considering the nearer future.
Just so you know, they don’t involve me going back to school in October. And before you start to feel sorry, I’d like to say: Don’t. Only if are filthy rich and want to try something different like putting me through college and allowing me to keep my apartment and my DSL connection and still have the occasional Amazon shopping spree. Then, feel free to feel sorry and start sending the cheques.
Anyway, don’t feel sorry, because it was my decision and I have various reasons and started to think about alternate plans a while back. The basic thing is that at the moment I just don’t dare to leave my job. We’re doing fine right now, saving up some money, and basically not worrying about money. It’s a good feeling and as of now we just can’t predict my husband’s job situation. Maybe it will change quickly and I can start thinking about going back to school, but right it’s just all too unpredictable and I like not having to worry about money. It’s nearly that simple, although of course it’s always a little more complicated, but I don’t think I need to go into all the details.
So, I told the husband I don’t plan to go back to college this October. It doesn’t feel right at the moment. It is my dream, yes, but I know enough of dreams to know that the harder they are to make true the better you feel once they come true. I can wait for another year, if that’s what this is going to be.
Maybe I will have changed my mind completely by then. Maybe other big things will happen in this one year. Who knows? I’m not unhappy with my decision although I do feel a little bit sad, because I had already kind of set my mind to it and it felt good. Now I know that I’m not ready to quit my job. Maybe I would have decided differently if I lived alone and had only me to worry about. But I’m not and I love my husband and this is what comes first, even if it means delaying one of the things I’d want so much.
I had some other thoughts about things I’d like to try out. One big thing (and it sounds like a minor thing or maybe just an excuse, but it’s not) is getting one of these fancy MacBooks. Why is that a big thing? Because I want to try out a lot of things in podcasting, writing, blogging, translating, designing and programming and sometimes I just can’t sit still and concentrate at my desktop PC. It drives me crazy. I think of writing, but I think of writing in bed or on the couch or on the balcony. None of my writing thoughts involve my desktop PC. I want to be creative and try out new and old things, but it feels like I need something more flexible, something to carry around. Something to do some live-blogging while watching TV or something to take out in the sun to write a story. When I talk about this my husband would just buy me a MacBook on the spot. I tell him that I don’t want that. I want this to be a thing to wait for. Maybe for my birthday. It feels wrong to just go out and buy one. I need to crave it, to really want it, to make plans what to do with it. Just buying one seems to easy. Now we compromised and he’s going to buy me one with the money from his next teaching job – whenever that will be. Hopefully soon. It’s a good compromise.
My future plans also involve applying to new jobs. So, it’s not like I plan to just stay where I am. I just am not ready for this big change yet. I’d rather just try a few things out first and see how my husband’s teaching jobs pan out and then maybe we can afford for me to quit my job and go back to school next year.
So, please don’t feel bad or sorry or anything. I made these decision after carefully thinking about where I am right now and what I want. I set some priorities and I came to a decision. And I’m happy. I am.
Summer is here and it looks like it might just be about to stay. Let’s hope so. You can never trust the weather in Germany but once in a while we get lucky and then we have a marvelous summer. I love it when it happens.
It fills my head with childhood nostalgia of those weeks of vacation with all the day just for myself, going to the pool, playing on the streets. Or later when I would hang out in the garden or just take the train to Cologne and spend some time there. Now, of course, I have to work and that is a little bit less enjoyable but not at all too bad.
I had a short nap this afternoon. From outside children’s laughter and voices floated in through the window. How nice this is. The warmth, the sun, just easy-going, hang out in your shirt and relax. I could go on and on.
We also decided where to go on vacation this year. We finally settled for France and now we have to find a nice apartment for two (or more, if it’s still affordable) in a nice village somewhere with a garden or a veranda where we can have breakfast and said village nearby to buy croissants and baguettes in the morning. I’ll tell you when I have more details. I am already thrilled about it and naturally all the memories of holidays in France come back, when we went with all the family and one year it was about 14 people altogether when we camped on the Ile d’Oleron.
This is just too nice. I wish those days would last forever. And here I thought I was the autumn or winter type. How wrong do I know myself, huh?
Anything with Kyle MacLachlan in it just can’t be really bad. There’s all I have to say about that.
I want to read 52 books this year. One for each week, as easy as that. If I counted right today I finished my 26th book. Considering that there’s still a bit left of the first half of the year I’d say that there’s a good chance I might accomplish my goal this year.
Let’s hope I do. Not that it would be extraordinarily bad if I didn’t, but I sure will feel good and be happy if I happen to achieve this.
Continuing with „The Amber Spyglass“… then it’s nearly time to order new books, because there are only two left unread on my nightstand.
