Archive for the 'Bitchworthy' Category

25
Apr 2008

Cryptic? Me?

I realized that sometimes not doing something can be just as hard as doing something. I mean, not doing something requires exactly what it says: freaking not do it. Don’t get up. Don’t sit down. Don’t go. Don’t cry. Don’t look. Don’t write. Don’t say it, don’t fucking say it. Yet, it’s amazingly hard. But […]

28
Jan 2008

If You’re Mad at Us, Just Tell Us

First there was leek. Then half a mandarine, partly rotten. Then on Thursday a dead dove. We’re either really unlucky or someone really hates us and has a really creative way of showing it by throwing stuff on our terrace, increasing the ewww-factor each time. Also, why is it that while the husband watches all […]

17
Jan 2008

Things I Don’t Necessarily Need to Know on a Thursday Morning

There is also a doorman and a sweet roof top deck with a killer view of the Empire State Building. Listen, Liz, I love you. I do. But see, we don’t even have a roof top deck, let alone one with a killer view of the Empire State Building. We do have a terrace and […]

3
Dec 2007

Shower Dearest

Why, why, oh why do you insist that there is no acceptable temperature other than either boiling hot or freezing cold? Yeah, I know you sometimes try to understand my weird way of thinking and make a half-hearted attempt to try out this strange and obscure temperature I would call comfortably warm. And just when […]

8
Nov 2007

I Mean, There Are Other Remotely Sane People In This World, Right?

Nothing like a phone call from your crazy bitchy soon-to-be-ex-landlady to screw up your morning. At least I have colleagues who are able to cheer me up. Please let this be over soon.

10
Oct 2007

Why Should I Think Of Something Original When I Can Use This

Ted: No, I meant do you have a cold? Barney: I’m fine. [blows his nose from a cold] [Ted and Robin look at him] Barney: I’m fine. My nose is just overflowing with awesome and I had to get some of it out. (How I Met Your Mother) Yeah. Exactly how I feel today.

13
Sep 2007

Once Again It’s Oh So Quiet

And that is because we don’t have internet yet. Yes, you heard right. Me. No internet. This is a very strange world where something like this actually happens and nobody dies or at least goes crazy because of it. There once was some unsecured network in the new apartment, but it’s either gone or its […]

30
Jul 2007

Note to Self

Running with a stomach full of gnocchi and chili is never a good idea. I mean, really, why don’t I ever learn.

19
Jul 2007

Getting Old

I thought it might be of interest that I successfully pulled out my fourth gray hair right here in Kraków. Apparently getting old doesn’t stop when you’re on vacation.

12
Jun 2007

Oh Well, It Lasted Over Half a Year

My other computer, the one that is not cute, portable, white and shiny decided it was time to have a couple of nervous breakdowns again. Now I can’t predict when it’s going to freeze or just plain die on me out of nothing. What I can predict is that it will happen, sometimes three seconds […]