My amazon wish list has 160 items. And I still want them all. I delete stuff all the time, but for everything I delete I add an average 2,72 of new things, so I don’t think I will ever get everything I want.

That, my friends, is the curse of the overly interested. I sometimes wonder how people with less money than we have can pay for a car, but then I remind myself that not everybody has an amazon wish list with 160 items and counting.

But I do.

I don’t know what it is so while in doubt, I’ll just blame it on my sickness, but I honestly could break out in tears every minute these days. I don’t, but I could.

I think it’s not too far-fetched that it’s at least partly my sickness, combined with stress at work, the newly acquired wisdom that my job is definitely not my dream job, a not-so-secret yearning for the all-time and oh-so-common house, kids and car, add a little of the realization that I’m a smart chick who only ever mastered the art of procrastinating instead of all the other arts she could possibly master if she would just set her goddamn screwed-up mind to it and not waste her time with computer games and TV shows (oh, but I enjoy it so much) and the final touch is both the gratitude for the wonderful man I could convince to stay with me and who has just proven to be the most caring husband and friend by making me hot lemon with rum and honey and bringing it to my bed and my thankfulness for all the beautiful music in the world.

So, if you think of it, it’s no wonder that I could constantly cry. And I wouldn’t mind if it wouldn’t look so stupid on the bus… and just because Ani diFranco said:

and i said „look at you this morning
you are by far the cutest
but be careful getting coffee
i think these people wanna shoot us
or maybe there’s some kind of local competition here
to see who can be the rudest“

A simple life’s my cup of tea
I don’t need nobody but me
What I wouldn’t give just to be left alone

Stay Home – Self

A weekend full of sneezes and coughs. Captured for eternity.

So, to be honest, sometimes I like getting ill. I like the extra time off work huddled between warm sheets in my bed all day without feeling lazy and having everything brought to me by my loving and caring husband and family. Of course that only goes for minor illnesses like a standard flu.

So, here I am again, sick! I came down with a flu Thursday evening, it was okay on Friday, but hit me hard on Friday night when i couldn’t sleep the whole night. Thanks a lot for headaches, a sore throat, breathing problems, a cough and general aches all over my body. Also, the having to go to the hospital on a Saturday and sitting in the waiting room for a mere two hours wasn’t my exact plan for the weekend.

But it wouldn’t be so bad if I could just seize this flu and stay home until.. say, Wednesday. But I just can’t. We have a major project going on at work and since we’re already always short on staff I can’t possibly not go to work on Monday. And after that we’re flying to Chicago so there’s no way I can get sick then. So, I couldn’t have just picked a better time and have my standard extra week of staying home and being pampered?

Damn.

And they say they want your stories
But they get confused
By all those words you use

Dar Williams – Your Fire Your Soul

Last week I learned that no matter how hard I try and tell myself that I don’t really need them, I just can’t walk by cooking magazines and/or cookbooks and not buy them.
And I can’t even control it, it just happens and suddenly I’m out the store with less money and more recipes. It’s like a blackout. Only without the black and the out.

I also learned that yummy oriental dishes aren’t as hard to make as you think. Once you know how to fold these damn triangles it’s rather easy really.

Awwwww… See? I’m wearing my helmet still. I’m such a good girl.

Today I learned that although I constantly deny it, I indeed have a life.
It’s kind of scary to hear someone of nearly exactly my age saying that he „might also do some testing“ later at home, because „he hasn’t anything better to do“ since at the moment „he has no real projects“. Excuse me very much? I have tons of tons of tons of projects. Okay, some of the projects are „watch the first episode of Rome“ or „write a blog entry“, but they’re projects and I don’t have nearly enough time to do everything I want. How can you not have anything better to do than work from home when you already work overtime at the office?

Maybe I just don’t have the right work ethic here, but I don’t get it. And I’m happy that I know the fine art from procrastinating, at least it keeps me from being bored.

Today I learned that my ability for multitasking ends when it comes to talking on AIM with two people while listening to music (and singing along), playing Spider Solitaire, looking for my husbands pyjamas, making dessert, entertaining a friend who stopped by late at night and blogging about how I can’t do all these things at once.

It was a good lesson.