I just wanted to mention that I have songs sung in the following languages on my iPod (and therefore my computer):

English, German, French, Italian, Spanish (only I think that’s just one from one of Caitlin’s mixes), Japanese, Icelandic and Estonian. Oh, and Welsh. I also have some Portuguese (namely Arto Lindsay) and one lonely Danish song, but they’re not on my computer so far. Which is a shame and needs to be fixed.

Plus, Yungchen Lhamo makes her appearance on two of my CDs, so whatever language that is she’s singing in, I’ve got that, too.

Again the question needs to be raised: What the hell am I doing as a computer programmer when my true love apparently lies somewhere else. But then, of course, I had to learn some languages for programming as well. So I might not be too far off.

I’ve successfully gotten an okay to order some stuff from my husband¹ and now I’m desperately trying to decide what exactly to order.
I’m at a loss. I’m struggling not to order the complete season 4 of Buffy, because I just complained being out of books and did at no point in the yammering mention the possible orderage² of DVDs. Or CDs. So I would feel like a deceiving cheater if I’d indeed order some.

I guess I’ll just stick to books for myself. But I might throw in my parents‘ Christmas gifts. Since I gave my father a DVD player for his birthday last week they’re going to get some of their favorite movies (Dirty Dancing for my mother, The Fearless Vampire Killers for my father). I might as well get them right now and try to avoid my usual last-minute Christmas shopping. Then, I could accidentally slip in my copy of Fame. Purely accidentally of course.

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¹Not that I need his approval. But since the Big Car Shopping our bank accounts are not at their best, so it feels fair to alert him of my online shopping plans.
²I’ve been reading „Slayer Slang“, a linguistical approach to the language used in Buffy and it might have rubbed off a little.

The above statement is actually more true than you might think. Fact is that I can look at my stats for my other homepage and for some weeks – and I’ve wrote about that before – one of my songs gets downloaded about 50 times on average for the last four weeks. I’ve traced it back to this site, which, due to some serious foreign language problems, I can’t decrypt no matter what.

I think it’s Japanese, but I can’t tell for sure, because all I see is a lot of question marks substituting whatever foreign sign there is supposed to be and even if I could see the actual signs, I wouldn’t know enough of whatever language it is to actually understand it. I just know that a lot of people come from that site to download my song. What does it say about it? Where is the link to my song? I simple have no clue.

Of the irony of that! I may be famous even in some Asian country and be completely oblivious about it. At least this way my big success can’t get to my head.

I will never ever be able to reduce my Amazon wishlist¹ to less that 170 items. Which isn’t a bad thing per se, because that basically means I haven’t run out of ideas for new books, DVDs and music. Plus, I never have to spend much time to find something new to read since my „still-to-read“-list is a really long list.

Tonight I have added the DVDs for „Fame“ and „The Rocky Horror Picture Show“. Which is tragic insofar that I can’t believe I don’t have these DVDs yet. How pathetic is that? If I can’t afford anything big to treat myself for Christmas this year due to some spontaneous car shopping I at least need those DVDs. And one or two books. Season 2 of West Wing is only 20 Dollars, by the way. I also need some more Azure Ray CDs.

And someone to stop me. I’m too only-child² for my own good.

Why again don’t I own „Fame“ yet?

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¹A list which I named „Things I Need to Survive“, if that’s of any interest to anyone. I just thought I’d mention it. And footnotes are cool.
²I must admit that using only-child as an adjective makes me linguistically excited.

I drove the car three times now and I haven’t driven it into anything or put us in any danger. I’m very proud of myself. I would like to remind you that – despite those two days somewhen in Summer – I haven’t driven a car in about five years, even more I think.

Then again, when it came to backing the car into a parking space tonight I let my half-drunken husband do it. I’m just not ready to do something I’ve never been good at after a five year break in the middle of the night. So, from my screwed up point of view I acted very responsible. And see, the car is parked perfectly now and all is well.

It is inevitable though that I do some serious parking practicing. Mighty big fun.

For the last two years a fashion company here had a little online game on their website where you were a little Santa Claus on a sledge and had to collect presents and stars and avoid the bad trees and snowmans and whatnot. I must have spent hours despeartely trying to break the high score. And failing to do so. But I was quite good.

It’s not there this year. Are you kidding me? This was nearly a Christmas tradition and I started to rely on it. I want my Santa and the sledge and the bad trees and the little huts with the bonus points and – fuck it – the snow making it all harder to avoid the bad trees in the higher levels. It’s Christmas, damnit. Do something nice for me.

I would love to amaze you with an incredibly witty and/or funny entry about something I did today. Yeah… forget it.

All I can say is that I was not made for work. Or at least not for what I do now. I’m constantly bored and waiting for the day to be over. It’s not that I don’t have stuff to do. It’s not that I don’t have a lot of different tasks to do, which, were I in a better mood, aren’t all that completly uninteresting. I’m just not cut out for it.

Fact is, if my husband earned enough for us to live on I would gladly stay at home and clean and cook. Yep. Decades of emancipation and thousands of women fighting for our rights and this is where it ends. The desire to be a hausfrau. But thanks anyway, I appreciate your efforts.

Then again, maybe it’s not work after all, but this job specifically or at least the general job description. There’s still hope that somewhere out there is a job that I’d love to do, eight hours a day and be totally happy. I just haven’t found it yet. Keep your fingers crossed that once I know what it is I want to do they have a vacancy. At least I’m not bitter yet.

It appears that we might have bought a car today. At least that’s what we told the car seller guy. And my father-in-law who wrote the cheque for us. Now we’re busy scrambling together the money to actually pay for it. Damn. How did that happen?
And, can you see why we did it?

If everything goes fine we will finally be able to not care about train schedules by the weekend. Yay for that. Our lives will be changed forever. Or at least mine. The husband already had his own car once.

It’s official: I’m scared to buy a car.
There might be an opportunity for us to get a good car for little money plus the possibility to pay what we cannot afford now back to my husband’s father without interest and I can already see myself chickening out.

I keep on imagining all the lots and lots of money that will just disappear once we have a car. Money I am used to spend on books and CDs and DVDs and would like to keeping it that way.

Can someone please calm me down? Especially since having a car could actually mean a great benefit for my husband’s job, so it might not be that big of a financial burden that I imagine it to be.

This is me now.

I suppose that’s as red as my hair will ever get without having it bleached before. I can live with that. Bleaching is scary and I try to avoid it.